Ladies' Nite

OK guys, its ladies' nite (so to speak), read on at the peril of your previous convictions...

Women have all recognized that men are different (some are a lot more different than others). Why, you wonder? Lets examine the differences, and the reasons for them...

In general, men are bigger, stronger, more interested in contact sports, hunting, war movies, violent video games, boxing, wrestling... do you see a theme here? We are very aware that men mature over a longer time than do women, why is that? Then, too, most men are not so great at conversation or shopping, is there something that ties these all together?

Within any society, men's and women's jobs differ, especially so in reproduction. Since the female is blessed by God with the ability to bear children, her mate MUST be her defender! Imagine, if you will, a family traveling. Mrs Caveman is 7 or 8 months pregnant, carrying her 1 year-old on her right hip, and the family's belongings (some animal skins and a sharp stick) on her back, when a cougar jumps in to attack. Mr Caveman leaps in with his spear and club, parries off the attacking big cat, then kills it.

Too untimely, you say? Alright...

Mr and Mrs Smith are leaving the civic function and dinner. It is fairly late at night. She, in order to present a good image, is wearing her best clothes and jewels. Suddenly a doped-up psycho leaps out from behind a van, intent on assaulting her and stealing her jewels. Mr Smith leaps to her defense, using his barely-remembered high-school boxing training to save her.

In both cases, the man must be single-minded enough to see the desired end result as a path-line through all possibilities, otherwise his mate suffers the consequences. Women are generally much better at keeping track of multiple tasks, but, to be a good defender, men must be able to single-task to the near total exclusion of any distractions. Men pay a fairly hefty price for this concentration enhancement. During pregnancy, the mother's body actually attacks the unborn male baby's brain, destroying many of the cross-linkages that allow the multi-tasking process to work. In other words, a male is made to be a primarily single-tasking expert. There are other costs, as well. Males are usually much less verbose, which makes it harder for him to express his feelings to you. He will assume you understand that his coming home at night shows you just how much he cares. You worry why he doesn't express his love for you very much? To himself, he thinks; "Hey, I told her I loved her just last month! Tonight I had seconds of her stew, how could she not know?"

Some of what the bible says appears to put women down, as regards men. For example, these verses are often misinterpreted...

Eph 5:22-24 "Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." (kjv)

Col 3:18-19 "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them." (kjv)

Many men (and women) choose to read a near-slavery into these verses, but nothing could be farther from the truth. Women are told to submit to husbands and to God the same way! It does not say you are enslaved. It does say, "...as it is fit in the Lord." In other words, as it is right by God. So, why would it say that "the husband is the head of the wife?" Think back to the single-tasking caveman above, as he jumped to her defense, he shouted to his wife, "RUN!" Should she not run, she could easily be killed by the cougar, along with her baby and unborn child. The husband is the defender of the family, and leads it, much as a general is the leader of the army, & for much the same reason, survival! Note that the husband is told to not be bitter against his wife, but to love her.

God has put a lot of extra time into making your husband, your defender. Trust God to know what He is doing. Recognize that your man will not be as good as you at some tasks. It doesn't mean he has stopped loving you, he may just need a little jog to his memory, every so often. Remember when you first met how you leaned lightly against him as you waited in line at the movies? How you touched his hand as he drove? How you stared into his eyes at dinner? These are some of the most profound declarations of love you ever made to him, and they are completely non-verbal. You were speaking "his language."

Remember, also, he asked you to marry him. He didn't ask that air-headed twit who jiggled so much when she walked that both her brain cells rattled. Sometimes, your guy just needs to be reminded of your love, and his.

A woman's role is difficult enough. Often, she is Christ's representative to her children, as well as her husband. Keep God in the middle of your marriage. Don't let the world shake your confidence. God gave you a tough job, because He knew you were tough enough. Prove Him right!

See you soon, in paradise!

Mr Mike